Deciding.

This blog could not have a more perfect title.
Deciding.

First of all, I am deciding that I am no longer going to make excuses for my intermittent blogging. It just is and will be that way for the time being. I decide to no longer make excuses or false resolutions. The blogs will come in their own time.

I am deciding what college I'm going to attend next year, or I guess more like trying to decide/see where I get in/wait on the Lord/thinking about the whole thing way too much. I have the choice; I can decide to worry - where, how much, how will I pay for it, where does God want me - or I can rest. And just be still.

I am deciding to obey God's voice and re-apply to Tapawingo for the upcoming summer. This decision has resulted in peace and a great sense of contentment.

I am deciding to live my life the way I live it. Every day is a choice; who will I follow? Who will I converse with? Who will I love? Who will I live for? What is my purpose? How do I react to those around me? What are my priorities?

I have made so many decisions in my life - and unfortunately I know a lot of them were the wrong ones. I have decided time and again to give into sin; bitterness, anger, selfishness. I have failed to tame my tongue, decided to speak foolishly. I have chosen to hurt, to anger, and to provoke. I have chosen to run rather than confront. I have chosen foolishly on countless occasions.

I have chosen grace - fled from sin and into the arms of Christ - after turning my back to Him. I have chosen to uplift, to encourage, to support, and to love unconditionally. This is the life I want to live.

I am deciding to follow Jesus with my life, even though there are so many unknowns in that decision.
I choose to find peace. To be patient. To wait. To find solace in. To surrender. To rest.